Started from the bottom, now we're... 20!
Today, I turn 20 years old. Yikes. Where has the time gone?!
While 20 isn't old by any stretch of the imagination, I have officially moved out of my teens and well, onto the rest of my life. It's incredible how much has happened over the last two decades!
The last year has been my best one yet. I've grown a lot, tested my limits and met some truly special people. Things just feel so right, right now.
20 Lessons in 20 Years
1. Embrace imperfection.
Throughout my life I've struggled with trying to do everything "right." However, in the last year especially I have realized that imperfection is interesting and wonderful. Doing everything right means living a very external life. At the end of the day, I answer to my very imperfect self. It's taken 20 years, and while I'm not totally there yet, I know I'm headed down the road of acceptance.
2. Fortune favors the bold.
One of my mom's friends told me this and it has really stuck with me. Over the past 5 years in particular, I've faced a number of challenges where I chose to take big risks. I have to say that this quote has proven itself to be true. Sometimes a big change is needed to get you moving in the right direction.
3. Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.
While I'll never be the girl who wants to go sky diving or get a tattoo, I do intentionally seek out opportunities to do things that are initially scary. Join a team for a sport you've never played before. Take interesting and challenging classes. Get coffee with people you have little in common with. Every time you move outside your comfort zone, you grow. Whether you stumble along the way doesn't really matter.
4. Success is not final, failure is not fatal.
In that same vein, both successes and failures are valuable. They teach us lessons about what works and what doesn't work. I find great comfort in knowing that both success and failure are temporary. No single action defines me.
5. You get to choose your friends. Choose wisely.
The people you surround yourself with are a reflection of you. There have been times in my life where I was surrounded by the wrong people and have felt really bad about myself. Friends should be supportive, loving and encourage you to be the best version of yourself. People who treat you poorly have no place in your life.
6. Family is, well, family.
No one will support you through the ups and downs like family- they've been there from the start! I was blessed with an incredible family who always show me how much they care. However, no one is perfect. Accept your family for who they are. Blood really is thicker than water.
7. It's okay to be irresponsible.
Letting go and having fun is important and healthy. When you have the opportunity to let loose, take advantage of it.
8. Love does not need to be tough.
If there is more hurt than happiness in a relationship, it probably isn't healthy. Right now, I am so lucky to be with someone who emphasizes celebrating and supporting each other. All relationships involve give and take, but painful sacrifice and love are not always the same thing.
9. Love always finds a way.
Real love knows no time or distance.
10. Be kind- everyone is fighting their own battle.
My high school AP English teacher told me this and I think about it all the time. You never know what someone else is going through. Make life a little easier by spreading kindness. You'll be surprised that most people will be kind back.
11. Life's short- buy the shoes.
Celebrate often, but responsibly. Enjoy every minute of your life because as cliche as it sounds, you never know what tomorrow holds. Live in the now.
12. Be good to your body.
I think my body is hyper-sensitive to my lifestyle habits. The second I stop sleeping enough or eat at weird times or lay around all day I get sick. Exercise, eat a healthy diet and sleep a lot. Not only will you look good, but you will feel great.
13. Do one thing every day that makes you happy.
Not everything has to have a purpose. I've struggled with unproductive "downtime" before. In fact, that is partially why I started this blog. Doing things just because they make you happy is perfectly okay.
14. Don't sweat the small stuff.
Details. Details. Details. Everybody always says details are important. How can I not be stressed about the details?! Paying attention to details and stressing over details are not the same thing. I've finally started to see a bigger picture for my life, which makes the little worries seem just that- little.
15. Work hard.
My parents have always emphasized the importance of hard work. My mom says it's just a life mentality- do the best you can always. This is such a valuable life lesson. For a long time, I was able to get good grades in school without working that hard. However, because the principle of working hard was so central in my family, I developed good habits that have stayed with me my whole life.
16. Expand your mind through reading.
Read everything: books, newspapers, poetry, magazines. Play with words, sentences, paragraphs, punctuation. Nothing teaches you how to write well like reading.
17. Sleep on it.
My dad always says this to me when I'm upset. It is such a valuable piece of advice. While I don't always physically go to sleep before I deal with a problem, taking 20 or 30 minutes to just calm down (usually involves working out, writing in my journal or taking a shower) can really put the issue into perspective. Often times my so called "problems" are not problems at all.
18. Give.
My mom is huge on philanthropy and giving to those who are less fortunate than we are. While I write about (and love) fashion, my mom always emphasizes the importance of balance. It's okay to have nice things, but it is also important to give (especially time) to make the world a better place.
19. Spend time alone.
I've always thought of myself as a total extrovert. I'm friendly and outgoing. However, I recently took a personality test that told me I was an introvert because I derive my energy from within. Whether you're an introvert or extrovert, spending time alone to reflect is so beneficial. I'm obviously very into the idea of putting things into perspective. Alone time is really important for that.
20. Carpe diem.
Enough said.
Here's to another wonderful year!
xoxo